I Could Live Here Forever
Books | Fiction / Coming of Age
4.5
Hanna Halperin
A BELLETRIST BOOK CLUB PICK “Halperin’s radiant second novel walks the fine line between the longing for couplehood and the torture of codependency. . . . Let the rapturous intimacy and gut-churning ups and downs begin!” —Leigh Haber, The New York Times Book Review“I read this book in three days and canceled plans to finish it. It is heart-wrenching and relatable in so many ways.” —Emma Roberts By the award-winning author of Something Wild, a gripping portrait of a tumultuous, consuming relationship between a young woman and a recovering addictWhen Leah Kempler meets Charlie Nelson in line at the grocery store, their attraction is immediate and intense. Charlie, with his big feelings and grand proclamations of love, captivates her completely. But there are peculiarities of his life—he’s older than her but lives with his parents; he meets up with a friend at odd hours of the night; he sleeps a lot and always seems to be coming down with something. He confesses that he’s a recovering heroin addict, but he promises Leah that he’s never going to use again.Leah's friends and family are concerned. As she finds herself getting deeper into an isolated relationship, one of manipulation and denial, the truth about Charlie feels as blurry as their time together. Even when Charlie’s behavior becomes increasingly erratic, when he starts to make Leah feel unsafe, she can’t help but feel that what exists between them is destined. Charlie is wide open, boyish, and unbearably handsome. The bounds of Leah’s own pain—and love—are so deep that she can’t see him spiraling into self-destruction.Hanna Halperin writes with aching vulnerability and intimacy, sharply attuned to Leah’s desire for an all-consuming, compulsive connection. I Could Live Here Forever exposes the chasm between perception and truth to tell an intoxicating story of one woman’s relationship with an addict, the accompanying swirl of compassion and codependence, and her enduring search for love and wholeness.
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Author
Hanna Halperin
Pages
336
Publisher
Penguin
Published Date
2023-04-11
ISBN
0593492072 9780593492079
Community ReviewsSee all
"I Could Live Here Forever feels like it refers to wanting to live in a dreamlike cocoon away from the rest of the world with just one other person who feels like home. It also refers to wanting to live eternally in flux amidst the space and disassembled chaos of a relationship doomed to crash and burn, but wanting to stay anyway out of a twisted love. Leah, the narrator, remains in a perpetual, deep slumber scared to wake up from her inner romanticism and face the facts of her and heroin addict Charlie’s relationship. She sees all the beautiful aspects of Charlie that make her love and love hard, in a way that makes it hard to leave, and seems irrational from an outsider’s perspective.
Reading this, especially from the outside, hurts. It makes you hurt for all the dysfunction, sorrow, and pain that manifests itself in Charlie and Leah’s lives. It makes you hurt that life sometimes careens down unexpected pathways of senseless grief. Boy, does Hanna Halperin immerse you in a mess that feels like the ugliness of a good sob wracking full-throttle through the fragility of your body.
Leah is also a writer getting her MFA and this whirlwind romance she falls into with Charlie felt compulsive and addictive, just like the drugs Charlie consumes, out of essential, paining need. It just about stabs you in the heart to read what Leah and Charlie go through and how it all ends. There are no clean breaks. Even when a relationship is wrong and feels suffocating, Leah keeps returning to it, against all common sense, all the same because of what she sees in Charlie. Very gripping and intense! "
"Did not finish, but enjoyed most of the 2/3 I read. When you have a book about an addict, I think it should show them in a positive light at first, like highlighting their good qualities. Then introduce the addict side later on in the story. Otherwise it’s like, Why is this intelligent girl in an MFA writing program so easily enamored with this generic addict character with no redeeming qualities?"
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Veronica Martz
"This book will break you. Just let it. HH has figured out how to really make Leah’s grief your own. You’ll be overly invested, in the best way possible."
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Nicky Molina
"This book was compelling. I just wanted to keep on reading it. "
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Meredith