The New Vampire's Handbook image
The New Vampire's Handbook image

The New Vampire's Handbook

Books | Humor / Form / Parodies

Joe Garden
Janet Ginsburg
Chris Pauls
Anita Serwacki
Scott Sherman
Being turned into a vampire is the easy part. Actually becoming a vampire is far more difficult. In today’s world of vampire-obsessed pop culture, misinformation abounds. A newly turned vampire who looks to movies and novels for answers to everlasting life’s questions will inevitably be reduced to a smoldering pile of dust. So whom can you, a neophyte immortal, trust to provide reliable information and proven strategies for leading your best and bloodiest existence? The Vampire Miles Proctor, editor of The New Vampire’s Handbook. In this definitive guide, the newly turned will find• a head-to-toe look at your vampiric body: how to harness your new powers to dispatch mortal enemies, maintain your fangs, and embrace your vampirosexuality• methods for luring prey, faking your way through meals, approaching other vampires, and creating a four-hundred-year financial plan• tips on acting your “age,” behaving appropriately if you see a human you knew decades ago, and dealing with epic vampire feuds• essential advice for blending in with the masses, from finding a coven to avoiding the media (and mirrors) to staying on top of the latest fashion trends• the joy of scrapbookingPlus helpful online resources, a glyph guide, renovation instructions for emergency lairs, a Ruling Families directory, nightly mantras, and personal anecdotes from The Vampire Miles Proctor’s nearly five hundred years of experience.Welcome to the night.
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Author
Joe Garden
Pages
240
Publisher
Random House Publishing Group
Published Date
2009-09-08
ISBN
0345516648 9780345516640
Ratings
Google: 5

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